My Blog, My Reasons...

I could easily sit here and tell you all how hard it was to realize I was different I am than everyone else all those years ago. Or write about how hard it is to watch people talk to my scar rather than my face. Or even how hard it is to show the people who matter my scars in full (not just the bottom half), or even how hard I still find it to look in the mirror and see those marks that I have to live my life with. Yes I am proud of my scar and i will answer any questions I have about it, but it still is hard to look at them my self or show them in full to other people (anyone with these scars may know what I mean.)

But I do not have this Blog for sympathy and concern, but to offer support and show others that if I can do it then so can they. I am 20 years old, and up until a few years ago, I thought I was so disgustingly different from everyone else, then a very very dear friend of mine had said 'God has given you this as a challenge to make you stronger than you would have been without it.'
'A challenge for what?' I asked.
'Who knows, god works in mysterious ways' was the answer i got.

I thought and thought and thought about this until i forgot about it. Now, sometimes, I like to think that it wasn't a challenge but almost like a path guiding me to where I am. If not for my condition, I would never have gotten to know Donna (www.donnasdream.co.uk) or her husband Az, or Salma or any of the other people I have gotten to know in this "Heart world" and I wouldn't have gotten my chance, through Donna's Dream, to offer support to people going through what I have been through.

Now don't get me wrong, I haven't got much going on a the minute on the heart front, few twinges here and there, but nothing out of the ordinary that needs recorded, but I can honestly say I have been through a lot more than many people, but still not as much as a lot of other people with CHD. If you have read my previous blogs, you will know that I have had 2 Open Heart Surgeries (OHS) and I am due another in at least 6 years, so despite my past health, I am a little less than healthy 20year old.

I have plans for my future that I now know I am going to have, I have achieved 8 GCSE's, 2 A-Levels, and a Level 3 NVQ pass in Childcare. I am a happy person, always having something to smile about, looking forward to my future and enjoying my life at present. Regardless of my past I do not dwell on it, I never make a big deal about how hard it is living with CHD or use it as an excuse that 'disables' me to do certain things. I know my limits as does any other healthy person, and do not exaggerate if I do get a pain or need to sit down, simply because I don't want everyone knowing about it, as other people tend to over react and if I say "I'm fine" I get stupid questions like "Do you need a glass of water?" "I'll take you out for some air" or "Sit down, you'll feel better". At the end of the day I am used to pains and palpitations etc and after 20 years I know how to deal with it, if i need water, I'll ask for it! Haha.

Anyway as I began with, this blog is for support, not sympathy. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to ask.

You can find me on Facebook, "Chloe-Ellen Franks", and I also have a support page on Facebook that I try to keep up with when I can, "Chloe's page - Heart to Heart".